TNB Commentaries 044: Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory

wonka-poster-681x1024Please turn off your cellphones and get ready to open a billion chocolate bars in the search for something you deserve more than anybody else because your dickhead grandpa said so!

For our 44th Commentary, we get a golden ticket and head back to 1971 for this flick starring Gene Wilder, Jack Albertson, Peter Ostrum, a bunch of asshole kids, and slave labor chocolate mixers & makers.

In our final commentary of 2019 we discuss how creepy and deranged Wonka is, the artsy fartsy nature of an actor, and James Bond for some hard to follow reason, so get ready for all of the craziness you’ve come to expect and more, gang!

URL: TNB Commentaries 044: Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory
Direct Download: tnbc-044-willy-wonka.mp3

This has been a feature of TS-D/JA Productions and JJ2E Media 2019

 

Twas The Night Before Star Wars

Twas the night before Star Wars,
And all through the house,
Everyone was clearly on edge,
Due to Ep 9 from the mouse.

The internet was ready,
To have its knickers in a twist,
After 2 years of bitching,
They were primed to be pissed.

They whined about Force Awakens,
Screaming and running for mace!
Rian Johnson made Last Jedi,
And they spit in his face!

Rogue One got to slide by,
They did not bitch very much.
Solo wasn’t nearly as lucky,
They cried worse and such.

“My childhood, you raped it!” They sure loved to scream.
All the while not realizing they had turned into a meme.

The dark side was winning,
This seemed perfectly clear.
No one knew how to fix it,
We’d hear whining all next year.

But all had forgotten a most spectacular fact…
Come February of next year,
The Clone Wars is back!

Trust in Dave Filoni,
Use The Mando as proof!
That truth alone should have you through the roof.

And so The Rise of Skywalker has come now,
But please do keep this in mind,
Many folks are sure to love it,
So don’t act like the middle of a great big behind.

Now as our tale nears its end,
There’s something I must say.
Don’t be a cunt tomorrow,
No spoilers on opening day!

Love it or hate it,
This you can’t do.
You must act like Jedi,
Not akin to poodoo.

The Nerd Blitz Question Of The Week #74

The year is drawing to a close, but that’s not the only thing that is nearing it’s ending.
Ignite your lightsabers and let’s dive into it, gang!

This friday the epic Star Wars episodic Skywalker saga comes to it’s end after 42 and a half years with The Rise Of Skywalker.
So this week we want to know: How Many Times Do You Plan To See Rise Of Skywalker In Before The End Of The Year?

Leave your answer down in the comments below or tweet it over to us on the Twitter @NerdBlitzPod or by using the hashtag #TNBQotW

Special thanks goes out to the good sir @SteBoost for creating our eye catchingly sexified QotW logo.

Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life Review

The phrase “And Now For Something Completely Different” is now a cliche when talking about anyone or anything related to Python.
It’s like talking about James Bond and mentioning gadgets, cars, and Bond girls, or cool entrances in superhero movies.
We get it, you know the thing.
But Idle opening up like this kind of epitomizes that oft quoted Cleese line.

Since this is an autobiography, I don’t think it really needs one, but just incase, this is your obligatory ***SPOILER ALERT***

I’ve been an Idle and/or Python fan for as long as I can remember, and yet this book somehow seems to deepen my appreciation for both.
He took a path into entertainment that’s been demolished by modern day standards and requirements and it’s fascinating to read about.
It was a path of opportunity seizing and having something to say, and that something isn’t anything harder to comprehend than “let me entertain you”.
And you may notice I won’t be calling him a comedian, but an entertainer.
This dude has tried his hand at pretty much every single form of entertainment in his 76 years, he’s probably even done some weird ass greased up, nude, interpretive dance, though he doesn’t mention it.

But it’s not all giggles and fun.
While it seems like he’s lived a life of nothing but bright side, the most resonant chapters are those where he talks frankly and openly about death and the friends he’s lost along the way, from musicians to comedians to actors.
The one that struck me hardest and was most unexpected to find the depth of would be Robin Williams.
After many mentions earlier, he spends an entire chapter recounting his meeting and bonding with this utter goddamn genius.
Idle was riding high, coming off of the 2014 reunion and farewell Python performances at the O2 when he got the call.
It shows Robin in a light that a fan could never have seen and it’s heartbreaking all over again.
The end chapter where he looks at his own eventual death is similarly hilarious and heartbreaking as well.

The only disappointment for me would be that he didn’t cover my 2 favorite movies of his thoroughly enough.
The first, Nuns On The Run, which only gets a paragraph of coverage, where as I could read an entire book about that particular flick.
The other, the chaotic but brilliant The Adventures Of Baron Munchausen, gets a bit more detailed and actually leads him to a revelation about his old friend Terry Gilliam and the tumultuous nature of his sets.
Both are serviceably covered, but I love them so much that I greedily want more.
And isn’t that the goal of every entertainer, leave them wanting more?

Boil it all down and this is the tale of a kid going from orphanage to Icon, and every step he took from one to the other.
He recounts how, where, and when he met the five other dudes with whom he would come to be collectively know as Monty Python, obviously.
But it runs a bit deeper than that.
There’s a soul to his story that, upon reflection, most autobiographical tales lack.
By definition, an autobiography is an exercise in introspection, but he comes at it from a seemingly wiser angle.
The title of this book isn’t just a line from a strange and anachronistic song in a movie, it’s truly his philosophy.
In the darkest of times, he faced it with a joke and a smile.

Let us what you think of this review in the comments below or share this post on Twitter with the Hashtag #TNBBookReview.

Special thanks to @ACFerrell1976 for her editorial assistance.

Also, as this is probably the last book review I’ll get to this year, I want to thank everybody for reading and sharing all of them and every other post we’ve put out in the last 12 months.
We greatly appreciate the support more than you know, gang.
So until next time, thank you so much.

TNB Book Club 6.03: Shadows Over Baker Street pt 3

511NAV28TQLWelcome back to The Nerd Blitz Book Club!

In this 3rd episode of a 9 episode series, we crack open a book we have been wanting to dive into for a long time, the Sherlock Holmes meets H.P. Lovecraft pastiche short story collection, Shadows Over Baker Street.

This week sees us discussing and dissecting the next 2 entries in this book, edited by Michael Reaves and John Pelan, The Weeping Masks & Art In The Blood which were written by James Lowder & Brian Stableford respectively.

So find yourself a copy of this gathering of stories and read along with us as the game is afoot when a dark cloud settles over the world of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle and things get spooky at 221B Baker Street, gang.

Also, a special thank you goes to @gigiamk30
for making this 6th series of The Nerd Blitz Book Club possible.

URL: TNB Book Club 6.03: Shadows Over Baker Street pt 3
Direct Download: tnbbc006003.mp3

The Nerd Blitz Question Of The Week #73

This week we are starting to get in the holiday mood a wee bit, so let’s get it and see what you lot think.

As Christmas rapidly approaches, we’re throwing a new spin on TNBQotW 22 and this year asking: What Is Your Favorite Holiday/Christmas TV Special And Why?

Leave your answer down in the comments below or tweet it over to us on the Twitter @NerdBlitzPod or by using the hashtag #TNBQotW

Special thanks goes out to the good sir @SteBoost for creating our eye catchingly sexified QotW logo.

Episode 090: It’s Even Worse In Person

20190929_171733

In this episode, she’s back so try not to get self-conscious as we welcome @gigiamk30
back to the table and we get so hardcore nerdy that it’s actually kind of embarrassing for everybody involved.

This time out the gate, we’re all over the map, galaxy, and universe as we go far far into the future with a Doom Star Trek update, Fitz lightly touches on some Warhammer, a story is told of belching at dinner, and even more weirdness than you can shake a stick at.

If you’re looking for dead kid updates, time travel, and other talk of similar levels of odd and inappropriateness, you’ve come to the right place cause The Nerd Blitz has all that and more, so strap in, gang!

URL: Episode 090: It’s Even Worse In Person
Direct Download: tnb090.mp3