Fitz’s Toy Chest #8: Luke Skywalker

Hey guys, this week we’re opening Fitz’s Toy Chest and taking a look at what might be hands down my grimiest most well-worn and battle damaged Star Wars figure. I gotta be honest, I’m almost embarrassed by the state this poor guy is in.

Without further pre-amble, let’s take a look at the original 1978 Kenner Luke Skywalker.

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Before we move on, just take a second with me and marvel at how bright the colors are on this pristine carded figure. Look how WHITE his tunic is. It’s whiter than Dennis Hoff’s teeth (RIP). It’s unbelievable to me that my figure once looked like this.

Now.

This is what a well loved Luke figure looks like after years of rough play and 4 decades of exposure to sun, cigarette smoke, and less than ideal storage conditions…

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Luke Skywalker
Company: Kenner
Acquisition Year: 1978
Acquired via: Purchase, Gasen Drug
Years In Possession: 40

First off, in my defense, all of these guys in my collection that lost their heads and had to be glued back on, none of them were my fault. I literally did nothing to them and their heads would fall off. Luke was no exception, as you can see by the terribly crude glue job. I think this might have been the second repair on this figure’s head, probably done by my me instead of my dad, hence the unsightly glob of glue sticking out of his neck like a goiter.

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Unfortunately for Luke, that broken neck was not his only trip to the infirmary. You can’t tell from this picture but his non-saber arm is also glued back on and frozen forever in that position.

The final broken appendage on this figure is his left leg. You can see how much farther from his torso that one sits, even see daylight through the joint. As soon as this happened it meant this Luke’s days of piloting X-Wings and Landspeeders were over. He’s been standing ever since.

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You can also see how the paint has worn off of his hands, revealing the yellowing plastic underneath.

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It’s pretty amazing to me that I never replaced this figure back in the day. I had multiple Vaders and Chewies and Stormtroopers over the years, but never asked to have this guy replaced despite all the wear and tear. I’m not sure why, but I must’ve been really attached to this specific figure and a replacement was just not acceptable.

Anyway, now I’m off to scrub this filthy beast. I think he deserves a nice rub a dub in the tradtion of the wildly entertaining Toy Polloi.

Come back again in 2 weeks for some less disgusting toys.

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Episode 066: There’s More To Life Than F**kin’ Batman!

resistanceIn this episode, the boys are back and as snippy as ever to bring you all the news that they want to tell you about!

Doom is reliving childhood traumas, Fitz is unsure about a recent installment of a beloved childhood franchise, and they bring you breaking Scooby news.

Apologies for another short ep, we were forced to cut the recording session short again, but we try to make up for it with witty banter and snappy come backs.

We hope you enjoy it, gang.

URL: Episode 066: There’s More To Life Than F**kin’ Batman!
Direct Download: tnb066.mp3

TNB Commentaries 026: The Mummy

themummyPlease turn off your cellphones and join us in our trek to uncover the ancient lost city of Hamunaptra.

For our 26th commentary, we cross the Nile and head into this action adventure hit from 1999 starring Brendan Fraser, Rachel Weisz, John Hannah, & Arnold Vosloo.

We talk about our experiences with this movie, Doom tells Fitz he was right, bold claims are made, Books of the Dead are debates, fascinations are explored, and fun is had, be sure not to miss this cursed ep, gang!

URL: TNB Commentaries 026: The Mummy
Direct Download:tnbc-026-the-mummy.mp3

This has been a feature of TS-D/JA Productions and JJ2E Media 2018

TNB Book Club 5.02: Role Model

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Welcome back to The Nerd Blitz Book Club! In this 2nd & final installment of a 2 part series, we are celebrating the recently released Dan Shamble, Zombie P.I. short story collection, Services Rendered, by reading and discussing the final 3 chapters of the short story Role Model written by Kevin J. Anderson.

We dissect the detail that only a true fan of all things nerd could understand and nail, monsters and their rules are debated, jokes are made, and fun is had, gang.

So grab a copy of this story, available in the Working Stiff short story collection, and join us in the Unnatural Quarter for this fun read.

Also, right near the top, we were lucky enough to get an interview with the man himself, so enjoy Doom’s near hour long chat with Kevin J. Anderson!

URL: TNB Book Club 5.02: Role Model
Direct Download: tnbbc005002.mp3

Fitz’s Toy Chest #7: Cobra Commander

Hey gang thanks for joining me for another look into musty toy collection!

So far in this series I’ve covered a couple of Star Wars mail-away figures.  This time I’m sticking with that theme but switching franchises!

In 1982, the first wave of G.I. Joe figures only offered 2 figures for the Joes to fight, a Cobra soldier and a Cobra “officer”. They basically looked identical with just a slight difference in their paint schemes.

Then Hasbro pulled a Kenner and introduced the first G.I. Joe mail in figure.  And it was a DOOZY.  No longer were these two hapless Cobra soldiers running around the battlefield willy nilly, now you could add their supreme leader to the fight!

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I can remember he arrived packed in just a clear plastic bag with his file card.  No cardback or bubble.  Which I should’ve mentioned in the previous mail in posts was the standard for these things.  No fancy packaging whatsoever.

Cobra Commander
Company: Hasbro
Acquisition Year: 1982
Acquired via: Mail-in
Years In Possession: 36

This figure was a bold departure from the color schemes they had been using on these guys. Up until now they had been all greens and browns and navy blues.  But this cat came kitted up in a bright, almost baby, blue dress uniform.

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But what really made him cool was that mirrored face plate.  Unfortunately, it was around this same time that scratch off lottery tickets and other “scratch off” items were getting popular and to my stupid 9 year old brain I thought OH SHIT I wonder if you can scratch that silver off and reveal his real face?  Dumbass.  So that’s why mine is missing some of the silver paint.  Spoilers: there’s nothing underneath it.

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You can also see this one has the chest emblem that was only available on the mail in version of the figure.  Later they did put this guy out as part of other sets and as a carded figure, but the chest logo was tightened up and looks a lot smoother.

I also discovered a bit of trivia while looking up the history of this figure.  This was the last Joe figure to be made with the “straight arm” design, after that all the figures changed over to the swivel arm battle grip.

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Another cool feature of this figure was a unique channel on his back where you could snap his gun in and have him carry it on his back.  Mine never really stayed in place, and was lost to the ages.

This is one of my most prized Joes, and is one of the more rare and valuable loose figures around.  There were a couple of times I nearly parted with this figure during a figure swap of some kind with my cousin who was also way into G.I. Joe (possibly even more than I was).  I was very lucky not to have let this one go.  And even though his face is marred, shockingly his thumbs are still solidly intact!

That’s going to do it for another edition of Fitz’s Toy Chest!  Thanks for reading.  Come back in 2 weeks for another trip to the 80s!

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Episode 065: Trust Me, I’m Turgid

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In this episode, the boys are back and they done brought their bitch sticks and brag bags to talk about some Archie goodness and badness.

After some hardcore angry nerd speculation, Fitz talks about what he did for Halloween, which leads to Doom telling a tale of winning money being a nerd.

Movie and TV traditions are upheld, more con stories are told, and then Doom teases next week’s big ep of The Nerd Blitz Book Club featuring his interview with world-renowned author Kevin J. Anderson!

All that and so much more in this lightening fast ep of The Nerd Blitz with Doom & Fitz, the most consistant podcast that you’ve never heard of.

URL: Episode 065: Trust Me, I’m Turgid
Direct Download: tnb065.mp3